Thursday, July 31, 2008

This is Funny

Concerning the idea of mandatory minimum sentences for certain crimes, I rather liked the scenario offered by a letter in the Star today:
Bill: Let's rob the local corner store. I'm short on cash.

Joe: Great idea. Let's go after 8, as that's when they have the most cash ... wait a minute, didn't you read the paper, there are new minimum mandatory sentences brought in by the Tories and they're tough.

Bill: You're right, it certainly dissuades me from this criminal activity. I'm going home to start applying for college.
Ah, the fallacy that is rational choice theory. Anyway, I'll have a report on my latest Tanglewood escapades later tonight, hopefully.

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Annoying Trends

The sheer randomness of Judy's latest post has inspired me. I'm coming to be annoyed by several related trends, as regards things that are trendy. In no particular order, current "trendiness" requires that one first of all purchase a white Macbook with corresponding iPod. Next, one must spend the afternoon/early evening at the local Starbucks/Second Cup/Timothy's or, better yet, an independent fair trade coffee shop. Ordering black coffee is not permitted; instead an elaborate latte with shavings of cinnamon atop the non-fat milk foam concoction must be obtained for no less than $5.95, accompanied by biscotti, of course. At this point, one must appear to be working or, even better, writing, creatively, for it is surely necessary not just to be creative, but to be seen to be creative (with apologies to Family Guy). Of course, such writing must be done via Macbook, and checking the news on or Le Monde is a perfectly acceptable as an alternative - one needs inspiration after all! (Note that being able to read Le Monde in French is not really required - if you can't, you're simply learning.) A further essential past-time is the keeping an "artistic" photo blog.

Finally, in order to be as trendy as possible, one must pack the Macbook away and jet off to Vancouver - somewhere in the West End, False Creek, or, even better, Kitsilano. Repeat the above, and make Vancity your home, except now you'll spend 70% of your after tax income to live in a 600 square foot condo (hopefully not a leaky one) and spend an equal amount of your time complaining about it.


Okay, I admit I don't know where I was going with that, but it was fun to write. Please note that it was not intended on impugning the motives of all Mac users (just a sizable number of them... ahem) or, for that matter, the veritably creative among us. Actually, there is someone I have in mind who fits this profile or at least soon will (though I'm not sure about the Macbook part). In order to reach his level, however, you'd need to start posting videos of yourself (badly) playing (bad) songs on YouTube. Links available upon request. ;)